Life's Twists and Turns

I've had my fill of the many turns life can take and have learned that you never truly know what could be around the corner. However, last March I had a surprise in my life that would truly turn my world upside down. I found out, I was pregnant! So many emotions went through me all at once. Shock, happiness, and mainly fear! I called the father to be and needless to say, he was not happy at all. We had not been dating for very long and his silence spoke volumes. I won't go into the details about him but he and I are no longer dating. I am now happily in my last trimester after many emotional upheavals during the first two trimesters. Not only was I pregnant but I had also just started working at a new company. Everyone knew I was not married and was only dating. How was I going to explain that I was now pregnant.... To my surprise, everyone was extremely supportive and promised to help in any way they could. The first four months were so hard, even though I knew without a doubt, I wanted my baby. I didn't realize the emotions that came with being pregnant and on top of that the fear that comes with "Raising a baby as a single Mother." Luckily I have a wonderful family and a tight knit group of friends who were there for me when my fears were so overwhelming I thought I would never be able to make it through another day. I cried at the drop of a hat, so terrified of being the worst mother possible. That went on for a very long time. Sometime in the middle of the second trimester I started to calm down because there was so much planning that needed to be done before Baby arrived. And you know what? Planning really helped me! I couldn't dwell any longer on the many fears impending parenthood can bring. Instead, there were things like childcare, crib, stroller, and bassinets, all that a baby needs before his/her arrival that lifted me out of my gloomy fog. And here I am today....I decided to create a blog about this because one day I am sure I will want to look back at this time and remember everything I experienced. I actually love being pregnant. Whenever I feel the strain in my lower back and feel exhausted just walking a few feet, I feel the baby rolling around inside of me and experience this utter feeling of what a miracle life can be. :) So from now on....I will post more stories of what life has been like to discover at 26 with the world wide open at a new company, I discovered I was pregnant.